Please post your thoughts

The River

1. We’re not married yet, if we go to Couples Therapy we are doomed.
2. The therapist is not going to tell me anything I don’t already know.
3. It’s not going to work.
4. People who go to Couple Therapy get divorced -Why go?.
5. It’s too expensive.
6. I need to work this out on my own.
7. We don’t have the time.
8. How would we explain this to the family?
9. We don’t have anyone to watch the kids.
10. We’re going to argue way more after we do this.

Please add your reasons for not going to Couples Therapy to this list.

Hope everyone had a safe, healthy, and sober new year.  In 2011, many great things happened to changeispossible.org. :

The website was redone and looks great. 

The Tales from the Office podcast started.

The Tales from the Office sound greatly improved.

and the best part–more great things are on the way–

Podcasts you can expect to hear in 2012 include:

Who Are You- a show about self esteem

Lyin Eyes- a show about infidelity

Prepositions of Communication–there are 3, and boy are they different

the 25 letter alphabet-(-guess what letter is missing?).

and others yet to be named

In addition, I will making a presentation at the Depression, Bipolar, Support Alliance(DBSA) in Morristown NJ on January 25, 2012.  The topic is : Resentment and Depression.  You can read more about this here.

If you can’t make it to the presentation, (with any luck), highlights will be up on the site in the DBSA  section of the site:

http://www.changeispossible.org/dbsa/

In this section, you will also find 3 of my past DBSA presentations.  Please enjoy them as well.

Again Happy New Year, enjoy 2012. 

Feel free to follow me on facebook:https://www.facebook.com/changepossible

Please comment on any of the information of this site, it adds to the social aspect of this blog.

Thanks for reading.

Frequently Asked Questions on Men’s Mental  Health

(from bbrfoundation.org)

Is there a connection between sports injuries and mental illness?

Do men experience depression differently than women?

Men can experience depression differently than women and have different ways of coping. Men may be more willing to report fatigue, irritability, loss of interest in work or hobbies, and sleep disturbances rather than feelings of sadness, worthlessness, and excessive guilt, which are commonly associated with depression in women.

Do Men Experience Postpartum Depression?

In the past year, research has shown that men are also prone to depression after the birth of a child. The analysis of more than 28,000 fathers determined that up to 14% of dads in the U.S. experience depression after the birth of their child, and that figure escalates to 25% in the period 3 to 6 months after birth.3  Approximately10 percent of new fathers experience post- partum depression, called paternal postnatal depression, or PPND. The strong correlation of paternal postpartum depression with maternal postpartum depression has important implications for family health and well-being. Consideration of postpartum depression in fathers as well as mothers,  and consideration of co-occurrence of depression in couples, is an important next step in research and practice involving childbearing families.4

Is there a substantial difference in the occurrence of suicide for men and women?

Women with depression are more likely to attempt suicide but men are more likely to die by suicide. Four times as many men as women die by suicide, even though women make more suicide attempts during their lives. Those at highest risk for suicide in the U.S. are the elderly, and particularly elderly white men who commit suicide at a rate of approximately 31.1 suicides per 100,000 each year. Among white males 65 and older, risk goes up with age. White men 85 and older have a suicide rate that is six times that of the overall national rate.5

How do body image issues and eating disorders play out in men?

Some men feel a lot of pressure to have a strong, muscular physique and may focus excessively on exercise and dieting. These preoccupations can turn to an obsessive nature, causing harm physically, profession- ally, and personally. People with body image issues may feel unhappy with how they look and feel self-conscious about their bodies.Men and women are affected equally, but may focus on different parts of the body. Men tend to worry more about their skin, hair, nose, muscles and genitals.6 An estimated 10-15% of people with anorexia or bulimia are male. Men are less likely to seek treatment for eating disorders because of the perception that they are “women’s diseases.”7

Citations

1       American Association of Neuropathologists, Inc., Volume 68, Number 7

2       NARSAD Young Investigator  Grantee Josee Savard, PhD: The Role of Hormone Therapy and Testoster- one Deficiency in the Development of Depression

in Men with Prostate Cancer

3       Journal of the American Medical Association, 2010

4       Medline.(PMID:14675298 [PubMed - indexed for

MEDLINE]

5       National Center for Injury Prevention and Control

6       Carlat, D.J., Camargo. Review of Bulimia Nervosa in Males. American Journal of Psychiatry

7       National Association of Anorexia Nervosa and Associated Disorders, Eating Disorder Statistics, (American Psyc

According to scientific research, with commitment and determined effort we can develop habits that help us achieve and maintain higher levels of happiness. Here are 11 such strategies to help you “construct” a happier life.

1. Count Your Blessings. Keep a “gratitude journal” and once a week list three to five things for which you are thankful—from the mundane (your flowers are finally in bloom) to the magnificent (your child’s first steps). As much as possible, vary the kinds of blessings and how you express them. And in the process, if you name a particular person who has been kind to you or influential in your life, don’t wait to express your appreciation. Write him/her a letter now, or, if possible, visit and thank the person.
2. Practice Acts of Kindness. These should be varied, and both random (let the dad with the crying baby go ahead of you at the checkout counter) and planned (read a newspaper to an elderly neighbor).
3. Nurture Optimism. Practice finding the silver lining in negative events, noticing what’s right (rather than what’s wrong) in a given situation, feeling good about the future (your own and the world’s), or simply feeling that you can get through the day.
4. Learn to Forgive. Write—but don’t send—a letter of forgiveness to a person who has hurt or wronged you. It may help you in letting go of anger, resentment, and feelings of vengeance.
5. Increase “Flow” Experiences. When you’re so absorbed in what you’re doing that you don’t notice the passage of time, you’re in a state called “flow.” Try to increase the number of flow experiences in your life, whether you’re completing a project at the office, playing with your children, engaging in a temple mitzvah initiative, or enjoying a hobby. Enhance flow by engaging in work and leisure activities that draw upon your skills and expertise.
6. Invest in Relationships. Having strong personal relationships is one of the major contributing factors to happiness. Put effort into healing, cultivating, and enjoying your relationships with family, friends, and fellow congregants. Act with love, be as kind to the people close to you as you are to strangers, affirm them, share with them, and play together.
7. Avoid Over-Thinking. Even during trying times, very happy people have the capacity to absorb themselves in an engaging activity. Pick a distracting, attention-grabbing activity that has compelled you in the past and do it whenever you notice yourself obsessing about the bad stuff in your life.
8. Savor Life’s Joys. Pay close attention to and take delight in momentary pleasures, wonders, and magical moments. Focus on the sweetness of a ripe mango, the aroma of a fresh baked challah, the warmth of the sun when you step out from the shade. Some psychologists suggest taking “mental photographs” of pleasurable moments to review in less happy times.
9. Take Care of Your Soul. Studies show that religious and spiritual people are happier and healthier than others, perhaps because of the social support of belonging to a close-knit religious group and the sense of meaning and purpose that comes from believing in something greater than yourself. If you haven’t already, join a synagogue or a community center—and become actively involved.
10. Commit to Your Goals. People who strive for something significant in their pursuits, whether it’s learning a new craft or raising moral children, are far happier than those who don’t have strong dreams or aspirations. Start by taking “baby steps” towards goals that help you accomplish something, nurture relationships, and feel better about yourself.
11. Use Your Body. Getting plenty of sleep, exercising, stretching, meditating, smiling, and laughing can all enhance your mood in the short term, and promote strong mental health. Practiced regularly, these energizing practices can help make daily life more satisfying and increase long-term happiness.

                   Listen to a preview for the next episode:

Who are you

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Enjoy www.changeispossible.org version 2.